IM Legend

Posted in Making Magic on January 1, 2012

By Mark Rosewater

Working in R&D since '95, Mark became Magic head designer in '03. His hobbies: spending time with family, writing about Magic in all mediums, and creating short bios.
IM Conversation With: White
White: Maro?
Maro: Hey, White. What are you up to?
White: I was just cleaning up my desktop.
White: I'm toying with recategorizing my folders.
Maro: Sounds like a wild night.
White: What are you up to?
Maro: Working on my column. It's Allied Color Week.
White: Do you know what you're going to write?
Maro: I don't know. Something that gets me less mail than last week. ;)
White: Do you have a moment to talk?
Maro: For my favorite color, White, always.
White: How well do you know Green?
Maro: Pretty well.
White: What I'm about to ask is just between you and me, okay?
White: You can't tell anyone.
Maro: Sure.
White: Could you ever see me and Green together?
Maro: As a couple?
White: Yeah.
Maro: I think so.
Maro: You guys have a lot in common.
Maro: I mean you're both real big on community. You both value the importance of the group as a whole.
Maro: You both love life.
Maro: You both have a real affinity for small creatures.
Maro: Mechanically speaking, no two colors overlap as much as the two of you.
 IM Conversation With: Red
Red: Maro?
Maro: Hey Red.
Red: What are you up to?
Maro: Nothing. Just working on next week's column.
Red: You have time to talk?
Maro: Sure.
 IM Conversation With: White
White: I just think the two of us would be a good fit. We seem like we complement each other well.
 IM Conversation With: Red
Red: I can't sleep.
Maro: You're going to bed? This early?
Red: No, I'm just getting up. I have a party in a few hours and I wanted to grab a bite before it.
 IM Conversation With: White
White: I'm not imagining this, right?
Maro: No. You two seem like you have a lot in common.
 IM Conversation With: Red
Red: I'm about to do something stupid and I felt like telling someone before I did it.
Maro: Crazier than the time you lit yourself on fire?
Red: My mana symbol is a freakin' flame. How do I not play with fire?
 IM Conversation With: White
White: So I'm going to tell Green how I feel.
Maro: When?
White: Tonight. There's a party.
 IM Conversation With: Red
Red: Um, Red, tell me what crazy thing you're planning on doing.
Maro: Sorry. Red, tell me what crazy thing you're planning on doing.
Red: I'm hooking up with Black.
Red: At the party.
Maro: Is Black aware of this plan?
Red: Not yet.
 IM Conversation With: White
White: I feel like I need to prepare what I'm going to say. I'm not so good being spontaneous.
 IM Conversation With: Red
Maro: I'd start by talking about something you two have in common.
Red: Talking really isn't my thing.
Maro: Sorry, my bad. I forgot who I was talking to.
 IM Conversation With: White
Maro: I'd start by talking about something you two have in common.
 IM Conversation With: Red
Red: I was thinking I'd just start with a kiss.
Red: A wild passionate kiss.
 IM Conversation With: White
White: Okay, how about this?
White: I can't tell you how cool it is that you've started to have vigilance. We're the only two to know the rush of not tapping to attack.
Maro: It's a little dry.
 IM Conversation With: Red
Red: Maybe a kiss is too subtle.
Red: We could just jump in the sack.
Maro: Whoa. Slow down. Do you even have any evidence that Black's attracted to you?
Red: We're both narcissitic, self-destructive colors that aren't afraid to take bold actions. Isn't that enough?
Maro: For a one-night stand, maybe.
Red: Yeah, so?
Red: You didn't think I was looking for a relationship, did you?
Red: I'm not so good with commitment.
 IM Conversation With: White
White: How about this?
White: Hey Green. How's it going? I just destroyed an enchantment and I'm on kind of a buzz. You know what I'm talking about.
White: What do you think?
Maro: A little forced.
 IM Conversation With: Green
Green: Maro.
Maro: Green! What a surprise.
Green: Are you busy?
Maro: You could say that.
Green: It's no big deal. I'll just catch you later.
Maro: No, no. I'm just working on next week's article. It can wait.
Maro: What's on your mind?
 IM Conversation With: Red
Red: Maybe I should just get Black drunk.
Maro: No, no, no. If you want to get together with Black you have to find common ground.
 IM Conversation With: Green
Green: So, I'm planning on hooking up with Red at the party tonight.
Maro: Red?
Green: Yeah, Red.
Green: I've been having these dreams.
Maro: What kind of dreams?
 IM Conversation With: White
White: How about this?
White: I was thinking of getting together a creature swarm later tonight. You in?
 IM Conversation With: Red
Red: Black likes killing things.
Red: I like killing things.
Red: Maybe we should go kill something together?
 IM Conversation With: Green
Green: It wasn't the kind of dream that would make any sense if I explain it.
Green: Plus it's not the type of thing you write about online.
Green: Well, unless you're into that kind of thing.
Green: I'm the last one to keep people from doing what feels right.
 IM Conversation With: White
Maro: White, you're forcing it too much. It's got to feel natural.
Maro: Trust me. You aren't going to attract Green if it doesn't feel natural.
 IM Conversation With: Red
Maro: Red, I think you need to notch it down a bit.
Maro: I don't think throwing yourself at Black is what Black would want. It's not exactly Black's style.
Maro: Black likes to take what it wants.
 IM Conversation With: Green
Maro: So, Green, you had a dream?
 IM Conversation With: Red
Red: Maybe I have to do something to impress Black.
Red: Maybe I could blow up the house where the party is.
Red: Black appreciates some good land destruction.
 IM Conversation With: Green
Green: My gut's saying I should be with Red, so I'm just going to go for it.
Maro: Do you want to think this through?
Green: Thinking it through? Who am I, Blue?
Green: A color has to follow its instincts.
 IM Conversation With: White
White: I think you're right. I'm overdoing it.
White: Maybe I should just start by chatting.
White: I could demonstrate to Green we're compatible by showing how much we have to talk about.
Maro: That seems like a better plan.
 IM Conversation With: Green
Green: My plan is to just be around red tonight.
Green: We can just hang.
Maro: Why Red?
Maro: I always thought that you and White might make a cute couple.
 IM Conversation With: White
White: We could talk about flash. We were the first two colors to ever have the ability.
Maro: Seems a bit touchy. Blue's been hogging the flash spotlight recently, and you know that Green and Blue don't get along.
White: You're right.
 IM Conversation With: Green
Green: Don't get me wrong.
Green: I like White. White's very cool.
Green: I love hanging out with White.
Green: White has this spiritual side that I really connect with.
Maro: But...
Green: There's just not passion like there is with Red.
 IM Conversation With: Black
Black: Drop whatever you're doing and talk with me.
Maro: Black.
Black: I need someone to talk to.
Maro: I'm a little busy.
Black: What part of "drop whatever you're doing" is throwing you?
Maro: It's just a little crazy right now.
Black: I wouldn't advise pissing me off.
Black: Remember what happened last time?
Maro: Yeah, I still have the welts.
Maro: What do you need?
Black: Just some advice.
 IM Conversation With: Red
Red: I'm not asking for anything more than a quickie.
Red: I mean we both have haste.
Maro: Have you ever thought of hooking up with Green?
 IM Conversation With: White
White: We both have an affinity for enchantments.
White: Maybe I should bring Green an enchantment?
White: An Aura with enchant creature.
White: Green would like that.
 IM Conversation With: Red
Red: I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought about hooking up with Green.
Red: Green would be an animal in bed.
Red: Seriously.
Red: I love how green acts without thinking.
Red: A color after my own heart.
Red: I know we could mindlessly attack together, among other things
Maro: But...
Red: I'm just more attracted to the bad color.
Red: High risk, high reward.
 IM Conversation With: Black
Black: There's this party tonight.
Maro: So I've heard.
Black: I'm looking to hook up with someone.
Maro: Let me guess.
Maro: You want to hook up with Blue.
Black: How'd you know that?
Maro: I just know the way this night is going.
Mark: Why Blue?
Black: Because Blue is smart and smart is sexy.
 IM Conversation With: Green
Green: My plans are that Red and I just hang.
Green: The more time Red spends with me the quicker it will become apparent how easy it is for us to be together.
 IM Conversation With: Black
Maro: Might intelligence be a drawback?
Maro: You're a selfish jerk. Isn't Blue going to figure that out?
Maro: I mean "selfish jerk" in the friendliest way possible.
Black: I could knock Blue out and we could go back to my apartment.
Maro: I hear kidnapping isn't the aphrodisiac it once was.
Black: That's why I'm talking to you.
Black: What do I do to make Blue want to go out with me?
 IM Conversation With: White
White: We overlap in so many areas.
White: Maybe I should just point this out.
White: I have a really cool Venn diagram that shows how we overlap more than any two other colors.
Maro: I'm thinking no to charts.
 IM Conversation With: Green
Maro: Green, I'm not sure "do nothing" is the most effective plan for starting up a relationship.
Green: I'm not doing nothing. I'll be me. I'll be there.
Green: You have to trust me when I say I really grow on others.
 IM Conversation With: Black
Black: What are Blue's vulnerabilities?
Black: That's probably the best place to look for an opening.
Maro: Have you ever considered hooking up with Red?
Black: Red's crazy.
Black: I love that about Red.
Black: Red makes me laugh.
Black: Red and I always have such a great time when we're together.
Black: No one makes arson as much fun as Red.
Maro: So why don't you hook up with Red?
Black: Red's fun for the moment, but not exactly the most reliable color.
Black: Plus if my lover's going to die, I really want to be the one to do it.
Black: Red's just so hard to trust.
Maro: Red's hard to trust?
Maro: That's like the pot calling the kettle black.
Black: I am Black.
 IM Conversation With: Blue
Blue: Maro.
Maro: Blue! I was wondering when you were going to show up.
Blue: I've been sitting home thinking.
Maro: Wild guess. There's a party tonight.
Blue: Yeah.
Maro: And you want to hook up with someone?
Blue: Exactly.
Maro: I'm guessing it would be White.
Blue: You figured this all out how?
Maro: It came to me while I was online.
 IM Conversation With: Red
Red: You have me all confused.
Red: What crazy thing am I going to do to get Black interested?
Maro: Find common ground.
Red: You're a wild man.
Red: Maybe we could sit around and plan retirement portfolios.
Red: What if I start by punching Black in the face?
Red: That would get Black's attention.
Maro: What are we, on the playground?
Red: Black respects power.
Red: If I could go toe to toe with Black, I think Black might find that sexy.
 IM Conversation With: Black
Black: I'm interested in Blue, not Red.
Maro: Why Blue?
Black: I like subtlety. The rest of the colors couldn't be subtle if their life depended on it.
Black: But Blue. Blue fakes right before it jabs left.
Black: Blue will mill someone right out while they're checking their life total.
Black: Plus, Blue knows the value of denial.
Black: Sure, Blue uses it on the stack while I prefer to be even more preemptive, but still we're the only two colors that stop you from ever playing the spell.
Maro: I'll be honest. For two allied colors you two barely overlap.
Black: Maybe not in mechanics, but we definitely share certain sensibilities.
Black: There's no other color that can kill you before you figure out what they're up to.
Black: Plus blue knows stuff.
Black: Knowledge is power and you know how much I love power.
 IM Conversation With: Blue
Blue: So I've been thinking about whether or not White and I have any chance.
Blue: And I believe we do.
Maro: Why White? I always thought you and Black might hook up.
Blue: I've thought about it.
Blue: Black's definitely the next smartest color. We're the two most tutor-friendly colors.
Blue: It makes very efficient use of its resources. After me, Black is the best raw card-drawer.
Blue: Black knows what it wants.
Maro: But...
Blue: Danger Will Robinson!
Blue: Black is charismatic but very scary.
Blue: Black can easily turn on you.
Blue: White, on the other hand, is much more predictable.
Blue: You know what you get with White.
Blue: White has stability.
Blue: Most importantly, you know White's going to do the right thing.
 IM Conversation With: White
White: What if I start out by giving Green a small power / toughness boost?
White: We could bond over something we both love to do.
White: My only fear is that Green's a little more into buffing creatures than I am.
 IM Conversation With: Blue
Blue: I thought about this all night and I think I know how to approach White.
Maro: How?
Blue: Text message.
Blue: I connect with White through our love of language and words.
Blue: I remind White how I too love flying and flash and protection. Like White, I tap things. I can lock them down. And I just adore Flickering.
Maro: And what do you expect White to do?
Blue: Pull out a chart.
Maro: Excuse me?
Blue: White loves charts. It's kind of cute. White can show how much overlap we have.
Blue: White will clearly see, as I have, the clarity of such a union.
Blue: I have no need to rush.
Blue: Tonight is just about making the first contact.
Blue: Just letting White know what I'm thinking.
Blue: We're going to take it slow.
Maro: What do you need from me?
Blue: Just some information.
Blue: Is White coming to tonight's party?
 IM Conversation With: Black
Black: Blue's coming to the party?
Maro: I have it on pretty good authority.
Black: I could slip a mickey in Blue's drink.
Maro: Enough with the plans of incapacitation.
Maro: If you want to be with Blue, you're going to have to find a way to make Blue want to be with you.
Maro: Scheme a little less and think a little more.
 IM Conversation With: White
Maro: White, have you ever thought about maybe hooking up with Blue?
White: I have. We definitely have a similar temperament.
White: Blue's the only other color that really ever thinks ahead.
White: And Blue's the only other color that understands the value of a proper defense.
Maro: Sounds like you two would hit it off.
White: We definitely click.
Maro: But...
White: Blue's just a little cold.
White: Green really has a warm sense of being that I find very attractive.
White: I feel like Green and I just share a closer set of values.
White: Green makes me feel better about myself.
 IM Conversation With: Red
Red: I've realized my problem.
Red: The party is hours away.
Red: Why am I wasting my time thinking about it now?
Red: When the time comes, I'll do whatever feels right.
Maro: Which hopefully includes not punching anyone in the face.
Red: Don't fence me in, man.
Red: I'll do what I've got to do.
 IM Conversation With: Blue
Blue: I've accounted for most of the variables.
Blue: I can't see why White would say no.
Maro: I could imagine a problem or two.
Blue: No, I've thought this through. It's essentially a done deal.
Maro: If you say so.
 IM Conversation With: Black
Black: I get it, I get it. Less coercion and more manipulation.
Maro: That's not exactly what I said.
Black: Tomayto, tomahto.
 IM Conversation With: White
White: I'm beginning to rethink the Venn diagram.
 IM Conversation With: Green
Green: I've realized there's no value to worrying.
Green: If it is, it is and if it isn't, it never was.
Green: I never asked, by the way. Are you going to the party?
Maro: I am now.

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